Shaping change is a concept from Octavia Butler's fictional Earthseed religion, found in The Parable of the Sower and The Parable of the Talents.
In this concept set, change is god. Change is the ultimate reality we must engage with. And though our power compared to the raw power of change is smaller, we are still active participants in the ongoing changing of the world.
Shaping change is a challenge for us to take responsibility for ourselves in a world which is bigger than us. And it includes the idea that there is no shaping without ourselves being shaped. This is a mutual interactive iterative process of responsiveness.
It challenges us to stay engaged with the world even when that is painful, even when it is frightening, even when it seems hopeless. To be vulnerable to the world and live in acceptance of reality and the assertiveness of taking what action we can in the face of that.
The opposite of that is denial and victimhood. In denial we refuse to accept the reality of our situation. And in victimhood we refuse to accept our responsibility to take action and contribute to the world, even though our power is indeed limited.
Nietzsche talks about this in terms of the ability to say Yes! to life. But what I am most reminded of is the idea from improv called Yes And, to take whatever situation or reality we are given and then add our approach and actions to it.
And I see this having value both in terms of social change and personal change, politics and therapy. For in both, there is no real way to negate what came before. We build on the history of the world, we cannot overwrite it or replace it.
And the same with the neural networks in our brain, the associations we have created cannot simply be deleted. We must add context and new responses to them.
This combination of openness and responsibility, vulnerability and assertiveness, is at the core of any process to change. We are shaped and shapers. Denial and victimhood are ultimately unworkable strategies.
None of which is to say that this is easy.
Openness, vulnerability, responsibility, and actively engaging with the world all take great courage. But take heart my friends, we're all in this together.